When I first went to concerts in highschool, I was completely overwhelmed by the whole experience of live music. My first concert was filled with a bunch of faux-pas, including wearing the band t-shirt to the aformentioned concert. I would also arrive to shows earlier than when the doors opened, and stand extremely close to the stage because I thought the sound would be better.
Later on I would learn that:
- bands take a long time to set up
- opening bands usually suck
- annoying people are usually closer to the front
- the sound usually sucks right at the front anyways
- wearing the shirt of the band who’s performing makes you look like a tool
Since then I have learned certain things and I have refined my concert going characteristics and mannerisms during the show to a simple list. This list is the result of many years of observing and experimenting with my own actions during concert:
- Start with arms folded stance
- Nod head in standard up-down motion (Note: if music is really intense, close eyes whilst doing so)
- Tap toe with right foot on the beat (off the beat if I’m feeling daring)
- Sway side to side occasionally
- Yell into my friends ear some random fact about band or current song (not applicable if attending concert alone)
- Check cell phone for missed calls or txt messages (I can tell you now, there probably aren’t any)
- Nod head in diagonal motion (intensity addendum still applies)
- Switch to hands in pocket stance (gives you the nonchalant, I can’t be bothered look)
- Look around in crowd as if I’m looking for someone in particular (I’m not)
- Yell “woooooooo!” after intense solo or neat sounding bridge
- Clap hands vigorously at end of song
- When right toe is tired, tap left toe
- Repeat any of these steps as necessary
This might possibly why I am the most interesting man in the world. I am pretty psyched that I will soon be able to add a variation to all of the moves in my current arsenal and that is “hold beer bottle” while doing any of the above and sip occasionally from thy beer bottle.
October 25, 2009, 11:21am Comments